Intimacy

What kind of reaction does that word evoke? I’ve heard it used primarily in bipolar contexts. We seem to have this fundamental idea that it is something taboo, often embarrassing, and very private… at least private to the point that it is inappropriate in public, yet very desirable. It’s highly associated with couples, perhaps intimated (pardon my nerdy pun) in public through hand-holding or meaningful glances, or even through the declaration of marriage vows. It is a closeness alien to the onlooker.

It’s something I wonder if I really understand, or if it’s one of those “you’ll understand when you are older/get married/have a kid” concepts. I look at couples and I wonder how it works. I’ve had quite a few friends get engaged and break it off, and I wonder if they were disillusioned, if they didn’t know the person well enough, or even if that is a valid excuse. I have heard from so many wise, older Christian women that you will never know everything about your spouse, so don’t act like it!

Then I recall times I thought I knew a person, and I am reminded that it is just as easy to deceive yourself, as it is for others to deceive you. I want to be that kind of constant person, but I know on my own, I’m easily not. Obviously, this reminds me of my humanity and God’s divinity, and I am so glad for that!

You see, the problem is, I try to match God to human conceptions of life, rather than matching life’s fractured images to God’s divine masterpiece. There was definitely a point in my life where I fell in love with knowing God and drew closer to Him. I see now that the seeds planted then are what kept me with Him, even though I was unfaithful at times. My intimacy with God is something I find desirable, even after all these years, and I find I learn more about Him, despite having heard about Him all my life. Ideally, this kind of intimacy should be active and something I protect and cherish, just as God set the example by sending Christ so we could be intimate with the Father and enter into His presence, and something He guards by watching out for my life.

Sometimes my communication skills fail. Sometimes I put Him on the back burner due to incorrect priorities, but He doesn’t seem to give up. He’s always patient with my failures while leading me to grow. I want this intimacy with God to permeate my life so that I can’t help but attract others to Him. And that’s the beauty of it; God’s intimacy is not limited. It’s more than enough for all.

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