I’m stealing the classic title for the mundane reason that I can relate to Elizabeth Bennett. I could talk about how I relate to an awkward family, how I am likewise stubborn and outspoken, or how my Mr. Darcy came and swept me off my feet, but I would digress.
Today I identify with Elizabeth’s pride in judging others and stubbornly acting and speaking on that prejudice. I find myself unhappy when I see others who are doing things I deem irrational, rude, or even sinful who are persisting in their ways and sometimes hurting me in the process. I am wounded when I feel abandoned by others or betrayed for any number of flaws, and then doubly hurt when these same people, without explanation or apology, act like nothing ever happened.
The problem with this whole situation is two-fold. One, if it is simply my judgement on them, I am the one sinning for not bothering to communicate or disregard my presuppositions until they are substantiated. And even then, the best way to respond would be in love, not out of hurt. Secondly, by not allowing myself to see these same people anew when time has passed, I am the one suffering from prejudice which is an injustice to those who have actually evolved more into the person they are going to be.
I experienced this around junior high, high school, and now even after college. It’s tough, but it’s not surmountable. My second instinct after hurt is apathy, but not caring at all is also a poor response as someone who is loved by God- the One who constantly loves.
This is clearly something common to humanity. Hurt can really cripple an individual. I’m not perfect, but I feel blessed God reminds me when I am being prideful in my judgement of others, and reminds me that I needed an awful lot of grace too in order to make any progress at all!
So if you’re hurt, don’t act on your fear and don’t anesthetize it; work through it and see what good can come of it.